this is why i have to leave
by wendi bird
Summary: He truly still believed they could have had forever, but maybe things were better this way. katherine/elijah/faye ; elijah-centric.


**entitled;** (you were everything to me) this is why i have to leave  
**summary; **_He truly still believed they could have had forever, but maybe things were better this way._  
**rating;** T  
**disclaimer;** i own nothing.  
**notes;** again, i feel the need to remind people: this girl? shipwhore. BIG shipwhore. enjoy~

* * *

**(you were everything to me) this is why i have to leave**

.

_watching you sleep for so long, knowing i can't turn the rain into sun any more_  
_i've given you all that i have, now I stand here, too scared to hold your hand_  
_you might wake to see the monster that had to leave, 'cause you see the shelter as the storm_  
_holding wind to keep you warm, you are everything to me, this is why i have to leave,_  
_so sleep well my angel._

- sleep well, my angel we are the fallen

* * *

He finds it funny that someone so loud-mouthed and cruel could look as peaceful as she does there, sleeping at Elena's side. Her hair is damp, locks of the brunette hair sticking to the sides of her face.

They play their parts as dopplegangers so well laying there together; it's almost impossible to tell them apart.

Almost.

He reaches out and brushes a few strands of damp hair away from her face, fingers hovering just above the soft, cool skin of her cheeks.

He wants to be the one sleeping beside her. Holding her, loving her. He has half a mind to take what he wants, but the way she shifts in her sleeps, curling into Elena's side, stops him.

He's out of the room and out of the house in a heartbeat.

He's accepted that she'll never be his, no matter how much it pains him.

She won't be his forever.

.

Waking up to the youngest Salvatore curled up into his side isn't as surprising or unpleasant as he'd hoped it'd be.

(He was hoping to bury himself deeper in his self-loathing. He deserved it for sneaking into the Gilbert household when Katerina had already made it clear that she did not want any kind of future with him.

Could he really get anymore pathetic?)

He looks down at the pink marks on his chest and allows himself a small chuckle, running his fingers lightly over the still warm marks. He can't help wondering if they'd actually taken all night to heal.

Shifting to his side, he stares at Faye for a while, wondering how broken she must be to promise him something like forever.

Reaching out, he pushes the tangled mess of hair out of her face and lightly cups her cheek, desperately hoping that she won't take the words back once she awakens.

If Katerina won't take his forever, he'll give it to someone who will.

.

Despite everything she's told him, he can't help the longing coursing through him whenever they come across each other.

He tries to speak to her, perhaps talk some sense into her, finds himself telling her he loves her and means it completely.

She laughs at his declaration and walks away.

(He's sure she mumbles something about him not loving her if he'd fallen so quickly into bed with Faye Salvatore.

He thinks she has a point.

He also thinks he wouldn't have done so if she would have at least given him a chance.)

.

Where Katerina wounds him, he finds Faye heals.

She's devious and sarcastic and witty, but she's also gentle and caring and protective.

He thinks they should tell her brothers and she's mortified, but resigns herself to the fact that they can't exactly keep what they have a secret for long.

He settles on dealing with Damon and her laughter echoes in his head throughout the entire day.

Yes, he thinks he'll enjoy their forever.

.

There comes a night he thinks she's broken him.

She's dying and all he wants to do is help her, but she refuses, insisting she'd rather die than accept his help.

"You and I, Elijah," she says, "We're not meant for forever."

He thinks that maybe she's right.

.

Despite it all, he helps her. It takes a promise and the help of a certain witch, but he sits in his empty house knowing that she's able to live another day - and several thousands more if she stops being so reckless.

He wants to make sure she's okay, wants to see her, have solid, _tangible_ proof that she didn't fade away, but he gave his brother his word, and he wasn't going to go back on it.

He's also sure that he loves her so much he would have felt it.

.

The haunted look on the youngest Salvatore's face makes him want to rip Kol's heart out; the light has left her eyes and he's sure a single wrong word would break her in this fragile state.

"Leave with me."

He's quite sure she'll deny him; grow angry at him even, for considering the idea of pulling her away from her brothers, from her home.

She's always good at surprising him, though.

"Okay." she breathes, "When?"

He doesn't hesitate.

"Tonight. Pack the essentials, I'll be waiting at the edge of town."

He had a few matters to settle first.

.

He tells Klaus he's leaving and his brother is pleasantly surprise at the way he's planning on keeping his word.

Elijah vows to return and kill his brother one day.

.

Finn seems disappointed in him, Rebekah throws a tantrum about putting women before family again and Kol seems intrigued only by the news that he'll be taking a very broken Faye Salvatore with him.

Elijah thinks he should add Kol to the list right after he comes back for Niklaus.

.

He tells himself that he's not technically breaking his word; he's leaving town to get away from her, so what harm would it do to get this final goodbye?

She's restless in her sleep that night, and he can't resist pressing his lips to her temple and soothing her. Pride bubbles in him when she falls into a calmer slumber.

He looks at her one last time before turning and leaving, knowing he was leaving her behind for good.

He truly still believed they could have had forever, but maybe things were better this way.

.

Faye's hand finds his as he drives past the '_Welcome to Chance Falls'_ sign and squeezes. He glances over to see a small sliver of hope in those fierce eyes and he laces their fingers together, squeezing gently in return and the smile she sends his way makes him feel lighter than he'd felt in quite some time.

This was good.

Maybe it wasn't how things should have been, how he'd originally wanted them to be but it was perfect as it was.

It was their forever.

**[end.]**


End file.
